Worked example · Drama · Year 8
DCF: Producing → Evaluating and improving digital content
A secure Year 8 response and a full answer key, annotated so you can see which success criterion each part meets. The full log below has 25 errors; a pupil who logs 14 or more correctly, including at least 1 missing sound, is secure. The corrected set has 18 captions, and no line is longer than 37 characters. Accept other sensible places to split a line, as long as no line is over 37 characters and no caption has more than 2 lines. Show this after pupils have tried the tasks themselves.
| Caption | What is wrong | Rule | Correction |
|---|---|---|---|
| Before C1 | No caption for the rain and the door banging | 5 | [RAIN ON THE WINDOW. A DOOR BANGS.] |
| C1 | hear is the wrong homophone | 2 | here |
| C1 | No capitals, no question marks | 1, 2 | Grandad? Are you in here? |
| C2 | Emrys is off-screen but not named | 6 | EMRYS: In the kitchen... |
| C2 | carry ad is a misheard Welsh word | 2 | cariad |
| C2 | mind starts a new sentence; no full stop or comma | 1 | cariad. Mind the bucket, |
| C2 | roofs needs an apostrophe (roof is) | 3 | roof’s |
| C2 | 63 characters on one line | 4 | Split into 2 captions |
| C3 | its means “it is”, so needs an apostrophe and a capital | 3, 1 | It’s |
| C3 | No full stops | 1 | with us. ... any more. |
| C3 | 71 characters on one line | 4 | Split |
| C4 | your needs a capital | 1 | Your |
| C4 | to is the wrong homophone | 2 | too |
| C4 | tea mower is a misheard place name | 2 | Tŷ Mawr |
| C4 | No full stops; 66 characters | 1, 4 | much. ... years. and split |
| C5 | thats and shes need apostrophes | 3 | That’s, she’s |
| C5 | wears is the wrong word | 2 | Where’s |
| C5 | No full stop or question mark | 1 | worried. ... door? |
| C6 | were should be where; its needs an apostrophe | 2, 3 | where it’s |
| C7 | were should be we’re (we are); new sentence | 2, 3, 1 | locking it. We’re |
| Before C8 | No caption for the thunder | 5 | [THUNDER] |
| C8 | 38 characters, so 1 too many for one line; no capital or full stop | 4, 1 | Your grandmother / would never have left. |
| C9 | she would of: the actor says she’d have, and “would of” is never correct | 2, 3 | Grandad, she’d have been |
| After C9 | No caption for Emrys laughing | 5 | [EMRYS LAUGHS] |
| C10 | your twice should be you’re; to should be too; no full stops or comma | 2, 3, 1 | You’re right. You’re too much like her, you know. |
Missed out completely: the 3 sounds that matter to the story (the rain and the door at the start, the thunder, and Emrys laughing) and the name of the speaker who is off-screen.
Each entry quotes the exact wrong word, names the rule and gives a correction that matches the script. The pupil spots that “would of” is never correct English, even before checking the script. Evidences criteria 1 and 2.
| No. | Line 1 | Line 2 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | [RAIN ON THE WINDOW. A DOOR BANGS.] | |
| 2 | Grandad? Are you in here? | |
| 3 | EMRYS: In the kitchen, cariad. | |
| 4 | Mind the bucket, | the roof’s leaking again. |
| 5 | Mam says you’ve got to come | and stay with us. |
| 6 | It’s not safe here any more. | |
| 7 | Your mam worries too much. | |
| 8 | I’ve lived at Tŷ Mawr | for seventy years. |
| 9 | That’s exactly why she’s worried. | |
| 10 | Where’s the key to the back door? | |
| 11 | Hanging by the dresser, | where it’s always been. Why? |
| 12 | Because I’m locking it. | |
| 13 | We’re leaving before | the river comes up. |
| 14 | [THUNDER] | |
| 15 | Your grandmother | would never have left. |
| 16 | Grandad, she’d have been | the first one in the car. |
| 17 | [EMRYS LAUGHS] | |
| 18 | You’re right. | You’re too much like her, you know. |
Every word now matches the script. Each sentence starts with a capital and ends with the right mark. Sounds have their own captions, in capitals and square brackets, at the point they happen. Only caption 3 needs a speaker name, because Emrys walks into shot in line 5. Lines are split after a comma or at a pause, never in the middle of a name. Evidences criteria 2 and 3.
| Line | Characters | Fixed version |
|---|---|---|
| Mind the bucket, the roof’s leaking again. | 42 | Mind the bucket, / the roof’s leaking again. (16 and 25) |
| I’ve lived at Tŷ Mawr for seventy years. | 40 | I’ve lived at Tŷ Mawr / for seventy years. (21 and 18) |
| We’re leaving before the river comes up. | 40 | We’re leaving before / the river comes up. (20 and 19) |
| [RAIN ON THE WINDOW. A DOOR BANGS.] | 35 | Fits: no change needed. |
C8 is 38 characters, so it breaks rule 4 by 1 character. It also has no capital letter and no full stop.
The pupil counts spaces and punctuation, and notices that a caption with no spelling mistakes can still break a rule. Evidences criterion 3.
Dear Mrs Morgan,
The school should not publish auto-captions without a person checking them. I found 25 errors in only 10 captions. The 2 commonest kinds were homophones, such as “were” for “we’re”, and missing apostrophes. The worst error was “tea mower” for Tŷ Mawr, because a deaf viewer would not know the scene is set in Emrys’s home. The tool also cannot know which sounds matter, so it missed the thunder and Emrys’s laugh, which shows his mood changing. I recommend that the drama club uses auto-captions as a first draft, then one pupil checks every caption against the script before anything is published.
107 words. It gives a figure, names the 2 commonest kinds of error with an example, explains how one error changes the story for a deaf viewer, says what the machine cannot judge, and ends with a practical recommendation that still uses the tool sensibly. Evidences criteria 4 and 5.
Showing the tone, for example (QUIETLY) Your grandmother, is better, because a hearing viewer can tell from his voice that this is a sad, private moment. Keep the bracket short so the line stays under 37 characters: (QUIETLY) Your grandmother is 26 characters.
Possible extra rules: describe music in brackets, such as [GENTLE PIANO MUSIC]; label the narrator, such as NARRATOR:; show song lyrics with a music symbol (♫) at the start and end.